DM – A Mexican girl has become a mother at the age of just 10, according to reports. The youngster arrived at a hospital in the city of Puebla, suffering from life-threatening complications in her 31-week pregnancy, including seizures. She gave birth by Caesarean section to a boy weighing 3.3lb at the Women’s Hospital in the city, 60 miles south-east of Mexico City. Her premature son is now said to be in intensive care following a bout of pneumonia, but officials said his young mother visits the baby every day to breastfeed, according to the New York Daily News. The paper said the hospital revealed the baby boy is in a good condition considering his premature birth and the mother is recovering well after first coming to the centre on October 22. However, hospital director Rogelio Gonzalez told UpFrontNewswire that the birth had been reported to the state’s Attorney General’s Office, which is investigating whether the girl could have been raped and who the father is. Mexican state laws prevent young mothers having abortions unless they can prove they were the victim of sexual assault. The legal age of consent is 12 and women who have abortions in Puebla face a fine or prison sentence if they are unable to prove they were sexually abused. However, the laws are currently under review.

Barstool’s commentary by maurice:

How you gotta breastfeed me mom you ain’t got no tits! The legal age to consent is 12? TWELVE? Mexico you sneaky bastards.

I thought you already had it all figured out with the rampant drugs and easy access to guns and policia who can be paid off for 20 pesos and churro, but now you’re going public with your pregnant 10 year olds? I know what you’re up to and I ain’t havin it. Creating international stories of sexually-active 10 year-olds trying to attract the best of the best pedophile football minds down to your stupid country. I know you’re hungry to get in the American Football business but shit like this just ain’t gonna fly.

Our child-raping coaches won’t necessarily just be into your children just because they’re young. Americans — no matter how rape-y — hold high standards. Our coaches aren’t just gonna bang any dirty brown preteen with a crustache. You better make sure those kids are supple, clean, and have basic English skills. Otherwise this 4th grader pregnancy marketing scheme will absolutely blow up in your face.

This has got to be one of the most hilarious articles I have read in a while. Yes, it is most definitely wrong. But it’s also fucking amazing. While I sometimes wish I could write in a much more sarcastic tone, I also feel I would alienate some audiences. And to be totally honest, I haven’t gained a worthy enough following to pull shit like that.

Until then, these guys are where you go to get your crude, sarcastic, fucked up responses to what’s happening in the World from the bullshit to the bull that created the shit.

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