Fellony Silas Charged With Felony Battery After a Bar Attack

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If you believe in God, I highly suggest that you not name your daughter Fellony. Why? Because if I were God, I would most definitely make sure that a child named Fellony wound up arrested for Felony because the irony and hilarity is just too amazing. Figure someone so lonely, such as God, would love to make thingsĀ likeĀ this take place. I mean, who wouldn’t?

Fellony Silas, 30, was arrested on Sunday after smashing a glass on a woman’s forehead inside an Indiana bar. The victim was left with cuts and bruises, but one hell of a story.

The victim who was six years Silas’ junior said that the she had bumped into the ironically named attacker on the dance floor, which then led to an argument. Silas went to jail where felons belong, while the victim was taken to the hospital.

I hate to admit it, but I’m a little ashamed because my girlfriend and I have a dog who we named Felon (female). I thought our bitches name was definitely fitting, but I can assure you she’s never smashed a glass over anyone’s head.

 

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